La Ciudad y Kunayala

It is weird being back in the city I had seen two years ago younger and more confused than ever about what was coming next in my life. Though at that time I had also been becoming more comfortable in the change of elements around me. When I had finished my last trip I had been feeling comfortable exploring outside of my comfort zone and it was what was familiar to me that became bizarre and awkward. Before I began this second expedition through Central America I was filled with excitement and anticipation to be back in the elements of newness and over awareness of my surroundings. Mary, my wonderful friend from home that is accompanying me on this journey, and I had a great time preparing ourselves mentally as we drove through California visiting friends and making our way to LA for our flight to Panama City.

Primero quiero decir que mi español no es perfecto y voy a traducir el mejor que puedo. Estoy en la ciudad de Panama por la segunda vez y es muy raro despues de dos años. Antes yo era mas joven y mas confundida del futuro. La primera vez estaba sintiendo mas comoda en el ambiente. Cuando terminé mi ultimo viaje yo estaba mas comoda en sitios nuevos y desconocidos y era las cosas familiares que parecian mas descomodas y raras. Antes de este viaje yo estaba llena de emocion a volver a la vida de un backpacker. Mary, mi buena amiga quien viajando conmigo, y yo teniamos un buen tiempo preparandonos mentalmente cuando fuimos por california para llegar al aeropuerto en Los Angeles.

I am reminded and reminded how our lives are forever changing and my new lesson had been that i Still have many many lessons ahead of me. My life at 26 is very different from what it had been when I started my last trip through South America just turning 24. The excitement rose as we stepped off the plane and our bodies became engulfed in sweltering muggy heat at 10pm Wednesday Jan 7th. Waiting for us with mine and Mary's names on a sign was Mario, the hostels driver. He took us to Luna's Castle hostel where our good friends Meredith and Wakan and Dain have been working for the last year. It was great to see friends and be back in Casco Viejo the old part of the city where I had stayed when I was traveling with Meredith the first time.

Me recuerdo como la vida está cambiando siempre y mi lección nueva es que tengo muchas lecciones mas en el futuro mio. Tengo veinti seis años y es muy diferente de cuando tenia veinti cuatro durante el primero viaje. La emocion levantó adentro de yo cuando llagamos a la ciudad y podiamos sentir el calor a las diez en la noche en la septima de enero. Mario, el conductor, estaba esperandonos afuera para llevarnos al hostel donde trabaja algunos amigos desde un año.

A few things have changed in the city since the last time I was here. Tourism has blown up and people are discovering the wonders of Panama. Everything that felt comfortable before I had to re accustom myself to. The catcalls on the street made by every male. The awareness that everyone is staring directly at you with no care of the effect. The buildings are still all crumbling to the ground and all the old restaurants I remember are around. But I quickly became antsy and impatient within a few days. I soon remembered that traveling you never are alone. You are always checking in with fellow companions to see who is hungry who is going out and what we are planning for the day. You wake up in the morning to people you pass the day with people and you go to bed with people. I finally took a long walk with just myself and sat for an hour over looking the water. the awareness of my tranquility and silence of mind instantly relaxed me. So I am slowly readjusting to my old life as a back packer.

La ciudad ha cambiado un poquito. Hay mucho mas turismo y todo que era co

I was sick with a slight cold for the first few days of arrival so we took it easy and were soon joined my our friends Kelsy, Wakan, Hopi, Dain and Katie who had been exploring outside of the city. We celebrated Hopi's birthday at fancy shmancy restaurant where we were given all the courses of the highest quality. I spent time re exploring the city and even got to visit with some friends that I had made the first time on my visit.


On the 12th Mary and I decided it was time to do some exploring outside of the City so we scheduled a jeep to take us to Cartí on the Caribbean side to catch a boat out to the San Blas Islands known as Kunayala. Now for those that followed my last trip may remember a story of Meredith and I taking a Jeep to catch a boat to Cartegena, Colombia. They may also recall that the jeep ride was horrific and took us 12 hours with many in the mud pulling cars up hills and flipping them over in the rain. This is the same path Mary and I have scheduled and the same Islands that Meredith and I sailed though but we are going to the more inhabited ones and sleeping on the islands as opposed to the boat. I was also told that the muddy road has been being repaired and improved.

At 4:30 am we woke up to get picked up. The ride was a completely different experience. It took us 3 1/2 hours and we arrived without having to get out of the jeep and pull at any moment. However I was exhausted. We were then picked up in a long wooden boat and a small motor attached to take us out to the Island.
We arrive to a island covered on every inch with Kuna huts made of Palm trees and other wood. Nixia is there to greet us a local who sets up most of the trips for the tourists. We are served breakfast and then taken in another boat out to Isla Diablo where we are dropped off with 3 guys from France and an Argentine. We are given hammocks and shown a hut to hang them in then the boat leaves. We soon meet Jimmy a 73 year old who I find out later is Nixia's grandfather. He lives on and owns the island.



I don't know if I could really explain what it is like to be looking at some of the most beautiful tropical islands. When traveling I often imagine documentaries I have seen or movies that show similar places and then have to shake myself into reality of understanding that it is not a movie and I am literally in the middle of it 3d everywhere I look white sand turqoise water and palm trees everywhere. If that doesn't make you feel good I don't know what does.


The kuna have a smaller stature and spend most of their time fishing, protecting and caring for coconuts and making beautifully sewn art called Mora (at least I think). The few that I spent time with are incredibly nice and humble. I could tell that tourism had taken over their lives in the last five years and now much of their time was cooking meals for gringos and business business business when it came to trying to sell their art to the older retirees who get off the cruise ships.

Life overwhelmed me out their on the islands trying to find my place of comfort sharing a strangers home and life for a matter of days in the most respectful way I could. I helped Jimmy gather pieces of palm trees and coconuts over the island for a fire and he talked with Mary and I as we washed our dishes on how life has become stressful with tourism and we are the first who ever helped him with anything. It made me sad to see how some of the travelers treated it like a hotel where they should be served everything and these people were just "hired help". I had many Meagan moments in my head watching and taking in my current experience. To see such beauty that the earth has created and how as humans we own nothing but pretend to just the same. Seeing the trash that had accumulated around the edges of jimmy's space and the way the Argentine staying on the island would talk down to him as if there should be some huge separation acknowledged.

There was one very difficult moment when after our first night of sleep on the island, which was actually quite nice other than the sunburned back, we were taken to Isla Pelicana to spend the day reading, swimming, resting and more swimming. As soon as we arrived Pato, the argentine, walked straight through the families home site and found a little sea turtle. He brought it over to us and I took my time with it but was not interested in engaging too much. As I turned around I saw Pato release the small turtle to the other side. A few moments later a few of the young girls and a boy came up to me and Mary and asked about their turtle and if they could have it back. I was instantly furious with the Argentine and realized he had not said anything to the children just taken the turtle with no care of the reaction and put it out to the ocean. What was upsetting to me the most was the lack of care and communication that was shown. They asked for 5 dollars and it was paid but Pato seemed unfazed by the impact he just had on the children in this family. Mary and I soon made our disapproval known and enjoyed ourselves on other parts of the island. It soon occurred to me though that that turtle would have spent much of his life in a small box just big enough for him to survive so that they could take him to the market and charge a dollar for photos taken. This saddened me to see the lack of compassion taken by the people of the island and by the tourists who treat it like a show as if this is not a real reality and they can just visit it from time to time.

I see how paradise on earth is not "perfect" as it is on its own. Mary and I were subjected to many elements. The many Esses I call them. Sand, Salt Water, Sun and Stupid people. Though after three days on the islands (our last two night were spent in the small village in a hut crammed in with all the others) my body was worn down. I was covered in salt and sand with no chance at a shower until the city and my hair became a salty dry mat that I kept tied up in order to avoid the feel of it. But by that time I had found my place. This is not to say that I did not bask in the beauty of the natural surroundings and immerse myself in the clear water.

I knew I could not do much to make every one behave the way I thought best but I behaved the way I could find myself most comfortable. Mary and I played with the children taking pictures and showing them the results. I talked with Kuna and travelers alike but only those that felt comfortable to talk to. About how they lived and what life is like in all parts of the world. I introduced myself to the people who cooked my meals and helped in any way I could. The last night we were served king crab and I was like a little child at the table. I am sure that I had more shell on my plate at the end of the meal than any of the other 15 people feasting. Though I felt no embarrassment. I indulged very little and I felt crab was a safe bet.

I licked my fingers of the meal and we went to bed very satisfied in order to wake up early and catch a small flight back to the city. The plane was teeny and we flew low to the ground and instantly we were on the other side of the country back in the city. Our friends were there to meet us Meredith and our good friend Marisa were visiting. That day a few blocks from the hostel was a free all day Jazz festival. So we danced and Celebrated with friends all day and it was nice to be clean again and be able to take with me all that I had learned from my stay at Paradise.